Adopted into warmth and love
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All around the world there are millions of children who are not fortunate enough to have a family to protect them. In Texas alone there was 6,342 kids who were waiting to be chosen by a family in 2011 according to the Department of Family and Protective Services report. Some of them may have been adopted afterwards, but others run with the misfortune and have to stay in the system until they turn 18. They go most of their lives without being able to feel the warmth and love of a mother or a father.
History teacher John Chapman, has domestically adopted two boys. Chapman said he had always wanted to adopt, even when he was a young boy. He said making a difference in another human being’s life is a goal he had set at a young age influenced by the situation his immediate family put him through as a kid.
“My childhood was terrible. I did not get along with my family at all,” Chapman said. “Drug use and addiction played a major part with my mom.”
There were some requirements and preparations that he and his wife had to make in order to be able to foster or adopt any kid. Any person who is interested in fostering or adopting will also have to take this into consideration. Chapman and his wife had to be Cardiopulmonary Resuscitation (CPR) Certified, they had to have a Tuberculosis test, their home had to have fire extinguishers, monthly Child Protective Services (CPS) visits, and they had to keep track of every single thing the boys owned.
The adoption process was challenging and it also wasn’t taken as easy as expected from close friends Chapman had.
“My friends at the time did not agree with my decision and would say mean stuff about my kids,” Chapman said. “Those friends I do not have anymore.”
Chapman and his wife fostered the boys for a year before they adopted them. The boys were 4 and 9 years old at the time. They’re actually siblings, and the foster home decided to keep them together.
Chapman’s wife actually wanted to adopt a baby while he wanted a teenager. A compromise came in when they decided they would adopt someone who wasn’t a baby or a teen. Two kids in need of a family became part of their family.
“We don’t have biological kids, so I honestly we don’t know the difference of loving a biological kid from an adopted kid,” Chapman said. “I do know I can’t imagine someone who loves their kids more than I do though.”
Chapman said he and his wife encountered behavioral issues when they took in the two boys. In foster care, the older boy was well behaved while the younger boy was always getting into trouble, but once the adoption process began the behavioral issues turned around. Counseling sessions are offered every week for all of them as a family so they can move pass every emotional issues the young boys are going through and to help them move forward in their life.
Although behavior is tough to manage, Chapman said it wasn’t the hardest obstacle they faced.
“The toughest thing is probably answering their questions of why they don’t live with their birth mom,” Chapman said ” Or answering the question about why she let them go.”
Chapman mentioned that people should only adopt if they feel like they genuinely want to. Also they must be able to take the stress that comes with adoption.
“It is harder than you can ever imagine, but it needs to be done,” Chapman said. “But not everyone needs to be an adoptive parent because it’s so hard.”
Thousands of children go every year waiting on the perfect family to be matched with them. Chapman’s boys found theirs. He definitely encourages more people to do research and make a family with children who are waiting for one with their arms wide open.
“I encourage more people to do the research and build a family with those waiting to be adopted,” Chapman said. “I don’t think things through. I just do them and I knew I wanted to adopt children.”
For more information on adoption in Texas click here.